Last week I had a little incident with some debris on the track — or the unpaved Lake Norman roads rather.

You don't need that line of plastic under the fender do you?

I took my car to my mechanic friend, whom I barter baked goods with in exchange for helping me take care of my car emergencies, since I don't have a boyfriend to. I had him look at it to make sure I didn't damage more than the fender part I still have yet to determine the usefulness of. He suggested I get new studs for the rear axle, and if I went and got some, he'd replace them for me.

So I went door to door from Auto Zone to Advance Auto Parts to NAPA, but no one seemed to have the right parts for my foreign vehicle. Or, they got confused when I strolled in stating, "I need some studs for my rear."

I need to take my dirty mind through the car wash apparently. But if you think about it, a lot of innocent expressions sound dirty.

"I prefer hard wood to carpet."

"I'm coming!" (Whether it's spelled with an o or u, it sounds the same.)

"Bangkok."

"I won a math debate" ... when it say it five times really fast.

So watch and/or wash your mouth!