“I am flypaper for freaks” … “Why can’t I get a good guy?” … “Only assholes are attracted to me”

Those are the sentiments that tend to be discussed at most girls' night.

I’ve spent most of my life wondering why I can’t seem to find a good guy, and I think I finally figured it out: because like attracts like. It’s the law of attraction … literally.

You get back what you put out. So that means if you’re only attracting assholes, then either that’s what you want (and you’re a masochist) — or that’s what you are, thus that’s what you get.

The last guy I dated (whatever “dating” means) was a lot like me. We got each other and understood one another’s hectic lifestyles and off-the-wall sense of humor. I thought that was a good thing. Boy was I wrong.

Like Tucker Max said in his book Assholes Finish First, “Show me a genuinely funny person without emotional issues and I’ll introduce to you my stable of unicorn thoroughbreds ridden by leprechaun jockeys.”

He has a point.

People tend to use humor to help them carry their emotional baggage — being funny to mask and over-compensate their true feelings.

But his emotional baggage, though designer and easy to carry, was still baggage, and in turn he lied like a Persian rug on a rich man’s floor, to hide his truth not only from me, but from himself. After I peeled off the first layer of his façade, I saw him for who he was … an asshole.

Shit, does this mean I’m an asshole, too? Like does attract like, after all.

I realized that I have in fact treated guys the way he treated me, like an option versus a priority. I've taken advantage of and lied to guys before, even cheated on one. And so I had made my bed and I was lying in it … alone.

Karma is a bitch, and apparently so am I.

So if you want a good person who is going to treat you right, you have to be that good person. Not just to the person you’re with, but everyone.

Don’t lie to people and you won’t be lied to. Don’t use people and you won’t be used. Don’t deceive and you won’t have to dance with deception. Don’t cheat and you won’t be cheated. Don’t hate and you will have love. Simple as that.

Follow the golden rule and treat people the way you want to be treated, and you’ll be golden!