Brooke Hogan's new album cover looks like an airbrushed t-shirt from a Myrtle Beach spring break. Poor girl has the genes of The Hulk and a tranny-looking mother. What's up with the piece of swathing loincloth missing at her hip? Apparently all overly-tan trannies with white hair go to heaven.

I don't know if "stolen" is the right word. If you look at the Twitter account in question, it doesn't look like anyone is pretending to be Kellie Pickler, just announcing random Pickler news.

Since the rouge Twit in question seems to be a fan, I'm sure they'll politely hand over the account ... and, hopefully, without charging Pickler a fee.

The Albemarle native writes on her MySpace blog that she tried to sign up for her own Twitter account after a few lessons from her tour mate, Taylor Swift, and she realized that she'd "been robbed" of her own name.

She says if the person doesn't give up her name, she'll have "no other choice but to steal someone else's."

That's the spirit.

Read more at Charlotte.com.

Twitter in Plain English:

Today, Donald Trump will decide the fate of Miss California, Carrie Prejean -- a Miss USA loser. But, what about Miss North Carolina -- the winner? While Miss California's boobs and opinions are out there for everyone to see, what is Miss USA, Wilmington's Kristen Dalton, doing?

You can keep up with her on her Miss USA blog. Here's a snippet from her latest entry:

Hola! The last few days have been such a blast! Wednesday, I traveled to Las Vegas for an event with the Las Vegas Convention of Visitors Bureau. I arrived back to NYC Thursday evening, and then attended the Education through Music Gala at the Waldorf-Astoria hotel where famous violinist, Joshua Bell, was named an honoree and he treated us with an awe-inspiring performance. The gala was a benefit to raise money to fund music programs in public school curriculums [sic] in NYC in order to provide a well-rounded, creative education for children. I helped raise $3,250 by auctioning off a dinner at a wonderful steakhouse where I will join someone for a delicious meal!

And, in case you missed it (and who didn't?), here's the Miss USA swimsuit photo shoot:

... of her title, pervs. All I really want to know is if the pictures are pre-boob job.

The directors of the Miss California USA pageant are looking into whether title holder Carrie Prejean violated her contract by working with a national group opposed to gay marriage and by posing seminude when she was a teenage model.

Pageant spokesman Roger Neal said Tuesday it appears Prejean has run afoul of several sections of the 12-page contract that all prospective contestants were required to sign before competing in the November state contest.

The detailed document prohibits the titular Miss California from making personal appearances, giving interviews or making commercials without permission from pageant officials. In the last 10 days, Prejean has made televised appearances at her San Diego church and on behalf of the National Organization for Marriage, a group opposed to same-sex marriage.

The contract also contains a clause asking participants to say whether they have conducted themselves "in accordance with the highest ethical and moral standards." As an example, it asks if they have ever been photographed nude or partially nude.

Read the rest of this Charlotte.com article here.

The Young Turks discuss the situation on YouTube:

All fans of shitty TV (like yours truly) are undoubtedly familiar with the Real Housewives of Atlanta. RHA was a spin-off of the Real Housewives of Orange County and starred one of the most obnoxious and tactless casts to ever grace the Bravo network. (And that's saying a lot!) Which made for some juicy-ass television.

Let us all kneel and pray for a second season. Amen.

All that said, probably the most stable Atlanta "housewife" is coming to Charlotte this week. Sheree Whitfield will be making her way to the Queen City on Saturday, Jan. 10 to serve as a party host during this year's Kappa Weekend.

On RHA, Sheree was usually pretty cool, never really went off on anyone, and — thankfully — never sported a wack weave on her head. Anyway, the party should be fun.

For more info, visit the Kappa Weekend Web site.

Local girl-made-good Fantasia is losing one of her Charlotte homes. Looks like we're not the only ones to feel the sting of the recession! The Real Estalker reports:

The foreclosure process for big voiced Miss Barrino's 6,232 square foot house has been started and unless she can make good with a pile of cash will likely be auctioned to the highest bidder on January 12, 2009.

Property records show Miz Barrino purchased the 6 bedroom and 5.5 bathroom pond-front mansion on Bevington Place in March of 2007 for $1,300,000.

However, the children can rest easier knowing that it does not appear that Miz Barrino will go homeless as records show that she also owns a second house on nearby Seton House Lane that she purchased in July of 2004 for $740,000.

What's more golden than digging? Silence. Kanye West was arrested last night, making this quote from Wednesday a bit more over the top than usual.

"I realize that my place and position in history is that I will go down as the voice of this generation, of this decade, I will be the loudest voice," he said in an interview on Wednesday. "It's me settling into that position of just really accepting that it's one thing to say you want to do it and it's another thing to really end up being like Michael Jordan."

"There were people who had the potential to do it but they went on vacation, so when Justin [Timberlake] went on vacation I made albums," he said. "And it just came out to be that."

We know he's speaking musically, because there is no way that Justin Timberlake would be the voice of anything more prestigious than a Disney character cartoon.