John Edwards, you're not too good for prison

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Photo credit: Jonathan Walczak from Edwards' 2008 campaign's Flickr account.
  • Photo credit: Jonathan Walczak from Edwards' 2008 campaign's Flickr account.

The News & Observer is reporting that former Senator, vice-presidential nominee, presidential candidate and beloved son of North Cackalacky, decided to take his campaign-finance violation criminal case to court because he didn't want to plead guilty to three misdemeanor violations, which would have meant six months in jail.

In case you've been under a rock, he's accused of using his campaign coffers to cover up his extramarital affair with Rielle Hunter — who has since moved to Charlotte — and the fact that her daughter is also his daughter.

Listen, John, I don't give a shit what you used that money for, but I am pissed that you thought, and apparently still think, you're above the law and jail time.

Enjoy your jury trial, prick. If there's any justice in this world, you and all of the other prison-avoiding rich fucks in this world — I'm looking at you Dominique Strauss-Kahn — will end up picking up trash (actual trash, not hookers) along the side of a hot Southern road only to go "home" to Bubba and his butter fingers.

I do, however, hate every bit of this for your children; they deserve better than this brand of bullshit ... and for what? So you could get laid?

Here's more from the N&O:

Just before John Edwards was indicted Friday, prosecutors made a final offer: They would accept his guilty plea to three misdemeanor campaign finance law violations in the $925,000 cover-up of his affair.

With the deal, the former Democratic vice-presidential nominee would avoid a felony conviction - and almost certainly keep the law license that had made him wealthy.

The government wanted to dictate a sentence that would result in up to six months of prison for Edwards, even with the plea to lesser charges.

Edwards and his lawyers were concerned. They wanted the ability to at least argue to a judge for alternatives, such as a halfway house, weekend releases, home arrest or some arrangement that would allow Edwards to be with his school-age children. He is a single parent after the death of his wife, Elizabeth, in December.

Read the entire article, by J. Andrew Curliss and Joseph Neff, here.

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