Movies I should like ... but just don't


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  • The Goonies

By Brooke Edge

A few weeks ago, I was yelled – rather, shrieked – at when two of my fellow film studies students found out I didn’t care for Meet Me In St. Louis. I knew that would be the response. It always is. So usually when the topic turns to MMISL, I just nod along and stay quiet, not feeling like entering into an argument over whether Tootie is precociously adorable or annoying and creepy (I vote the latter). I’m not sure what inspired me to speak up this time, but man, did I get an earful on how wrong I was.

So it started me thinking about other movies that typically get me a similarly shrill response. The following are a few flicks that aren’t necessarily critically revered (though some are), but moreover seem to mark me as an ignorant outsider whenever I speak up and say what I think. Well, now I’m going public, owning up to what I hate. Deal with it.

The Last Days of Disco – I think this one means I can never be accepted by the hipsters. Why does everyone like this movie? Why??? I fully recognize the major acting skills of Chloe Sevigny, and the clothes in this movie were indeed cool, but everything else I found insanely irritating. In the name of fair and balanced, though, here’s a pretty good article that takes the other point of view.

Two or Three Things I Know About Her – Jean-Luc Godard is a narrative innovator, a master of visual creativity, a hip ‘60s French dude, blah, blah, blah. I get all of that. I appreciate it. It just doesn’t mean I have to like his stuff — other than the end of Pierrot le fou; that was mind-blowing. (Ha! Film nerd jokes!) Two or Three Things especially drives me nuts, as it basically comes off to me as 90 minutes of French people taking long drags off cigarettes, turning to the camera grumpily, and saying, “But what IS life, really?” Ugh, shoot me.

Ronin – I’ll admit that my negative view of this movie is most likely due to seeing it on a really bad date. Everyone else I talk to says it’s a fun action movie driven by Robert De Niro and Jean Reno zipping around Europe in sweet cars. However, it’s hard to get any of that when you’re spending the vast majority of the movie trying to plan a script for how to break up with the guy sitting next to you after the credits roll. Never being able to enjoy that movie was worth the breakup, though.


Zoolander – I’m sure there are lots of other people who think this movie is gratingly stupid, but none of them happen to be my friends. This does not mean I don’t appreciate a movie based on good old-fashioned stupid humor. This does, however, mean that I don’t find it funny when my friends post pictures of their babies supposedly making “Blue Steel” on Facebook.

The Goonies – This is probably my most egregious offence, judging by the responses I get. Maybe it’s the greatest film ever made, but I refuse to watch. The Goonies was the first non-animated movie I saw in the cinema. I was 5 years old, and still have vivid memories of Gavin Hendry and I going with his mom for a little movie excursion. Big mistake. Huge. I didn’t sleep for untold days afterward, and seriously get scared when I see clips from it today. (Same with Harry and the Hendersons, but I bet a lot of other people think that movie sucks, too.) So The Goonies may be amazing on all filmic levels, but I hate it with a burning, anger-fueled loathing just for subjecting me to intense nightmares.

Any similar movie hatreds – irrational or not – that you’d like to share?


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