Heard: random drunken statements (August/September 2011)

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This month’s edition of “Heard: random drunken statements” is a two for one deal. I didn’t overhear enough quality drunken banter in August alone to justify a whole post, but the drunks of Charlotte made up for it by coming up with a few good ones in September.

So here you are, the best overheard babble by your fellow Charlotteans in the months of August and September. Keep drinking, keep talking, and I’ll keep taking notes.

August

Female Partygoer: “I worked at Chuck E Cheese’s once. I got groped in the Chuck E Cheese costume. A guy came up to me and said, ‘I know you’re a girl in there’ and grabbed my ass.”

Male Partygoer: “I’ve thought about being homeless before, but I think it’d be too much work.”

September

Woman at Elizabeth Billiards, while looking at a picture of a baby: "That's the kind of baby I'd punch other babies for."

Male Partygoer: "I feel like everything you've ever said has made me think you're stupid, but also that you don't have to be."

Female Partygoer: “Sometimes tequila takes my clothes off.”

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