Two of my closest friends, a straight couple, recently got engaged. As an engagement present, my female friend would like to include me in their sex life, potentially for just one evening or perhaps for longer. She and I have had a few make-out sessions while her fiancé watched, and I am somewhat turned on by the idea. But there's a catch: I'm currently seeing someone who says he doesn't consider hypothetical situations like this to be "cheating" but would probably be uncomfortable if I actually did this for my friends. Should I tell my friends I can't go any further out of respect for his feelings, or tell him that the situation is no longer hypothetical and risk making him uncomfortable, or help my friends out on the condition that it only happens once and not tell him at all?
Toying With A Third
Well aren't you the selfless little people-pleaser, TWAT. You're willing to sleep with this couple -- maybe once, maybe weekly -- even though you're only "somewhat turned on by the idea." But if you "did this for [your] friends" -- if you condescended to help them out -- what do you tell the man you're currently seeing? You could tell him the truth, of course, which would be the right thing, the responsible thing, the ethical thing -- but that might make him uncomfortable, poor dear. So you hesitate. Oh, not out of selfish desire to avoid an awkward conversation, of course, just out of an overabundance of concern for his feelings.
Sorry, TWAT, since your boyfriend has already given you his hypothetical OK to get with your friends, there's no way to justify making an engagement present of yourself without informing him in advance. And let's be honest, shall we? Your reluctance to inform the boyfriend isn't about a selfless desire to spare his feelings, but your cowardly desire to avoid an awkward conversation and -- if he balks at this hypothetical becoming a reality -- a potentially relationship-ending conversation.
But before you can be honest with the boyfriend, TWAT, you're going to need to be honest with yourself. Repeat after me: "Honey, remember that couple, my insanely hot friends? They've asked me to have a three-way with them and I want to so bad my ovaries are throbbing -- that cool with you?"
I'm a woman with an extremely gorgeous, brilliant, openly (mostly) gay friend who I've been having sex with infrequently but regularly over the last six months. I know why I'm doing it: I enjoy his company, he's hot, the sex is incredible. But I'm not sure why he's having sex with me, a straight girl. The most I could get out of him is that he thinks I have a "masculine sexuality." I'd like to have a clearer understanding of where our friendship/sexual relationship stands. I am a person who likes to talk about everything, and he is not.
Confused Over Male Eroticism
I would hazard a guess that your (mostly) gay friend is doing you for the same reasons you're doing him: He enjoys your company, you're hot, and the sex is great. As for where you stand, well, that depends on what you want. Do you want hot sex with a hot guy every once in a while? Then you're in good standing. Do you want a relationship? Then you're deluding yourself. Very few gay-identified men are secretly closeted straight guys. When a bisexual guy identifies as gay, it's typically because he's not romantically attracted to women. He can fuck women, but he doesn't fall in love with women. Most bisexual guys are the opposite of your (mostly) gay friend, i.e., they can fuck men but they don't fall in love with men, which is why most bi guys identify as (mostly) straight.
I'm a pretty hairy dude. I like my hairy chest. I like growing a beard in the winter. I like my hairy arms and legs. The only place that I don't like hair is my balls. The thought of accidentally cutting myself down there has been a pretty good deterrent from going at it with a razor, and just the idea of putting some hair-removal product like Nair down there makes me wince. I've poked around the Internet and haven't been able to find a real satisfactory answer, so I thought I'd turn to my last resort: Is there a safe, easy, relatively pain-free way to get rid of this unsightly hair?
Clever Nickname Up To You
Um ... nope. Waxing is the way to go, but it smarts.