Music » Brittney After Dark

Weddings: the biggest party of all

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There are all kinds of parties, and there are all kinds of reasons to party -- from birthdays to bar openings (and in The Forum's case, closing). But the biggest party of all, and the biggest cause for celebration (or so I've been told) is a wedding.

I know there are many of us who have the same enthusiasm for weddings as they do a gynecologist appointment ... it's just something women have to do, and men have to support. I just don't get the wedding tradition: eat cake, throw flowers, wear white. I've been to upward of 50 weddings in my lifetime, and not a single one of the brides was a virgin -- the jig is up.

So, if your summer vacation plans consist of taking trips for weddings, and your nightlife is monopolized by receptions, here is a guide to surviving wedding season.

Two words for you: Open bar. Although, there is something about weddings that tend to make even the most independent women emotionally unstable -- and the open bar could be to blame.

In the past four Saturdays alone, I've been in and to five weddings -- meaning I had to attend two at the same time. If you find yourself in this situation just base your decision on which to attend by who has a shorter ceremony and longer reception. For example, I went to a quick ceremony then skipped out at the reception at the Mint Museum in order to make it to another reception at Hearst Tower. I thought I'd gotten away with my covert operation until the bride at wedding number two called me out.

"You just came for the party? And you wore white? Bitch!" She said it in a way that I couldn't tell if she was kidding or not. I looked down at my pale pink and ivory dress to see if the lighting made it look white or something ... Which leads me to my next tip: Beware that even the sweetest of girls can morph into a bridezilla.

But the most important thing to remember is that all a wedding really is after all is a big party and celebration ... so have fun. Say I do.

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