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Total control

Time for real talk

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I'm in a BDSM-centered relationship with my Master/boyfriend and wear his collar. We have a tumultuous relationship and argue often. The center of these arguments seems to be that I see myself as a strong female and in control of many aspects of my life, and he'd rather have me just go along with whatever he says. I like some BDSM play in the bedroom, but he wants me to be submissive to him 24/7. I've wanted breast augmentation for many years. He joined me at the first consult and was talking about the smallest implants possible. I have a small chest, and he is attracted to small chests, but I knew I wanted something more substantial—especially since I am paying for it and it's my body. I ended up going bigger than what he wanted without telling him, and he's expressed anger about what I did to "his body" (he believes he owns my body) without his consent. I couldn't be happier with my boobs. He hates them. Now I just don't know about my boyfriend. I love him, but I feel like he can't remove himself from decisions I make for myself.

Tits In Trouble

Your Master/boyfriend wants a slave/girlfriend — he wants (and seems to think he's in) a total power exchange relationship. But you want a guy who's your equal out of the bedroom (and can't dictate implant sizes to you because it's not "his body," it's yours) and a fun BDSM play-partner/Master in the bedroom. You two need to have an out-of-role conversation/renegotiation about your interests in kink, and your limits and his expectations — and if you can't get on the same page (if he can't dial it way back), you'll have to end things.

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