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The short end of the stick

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I'm a 28-year-old straight guy. I'm also five feet six and 124 pounds. I know, I know — I'm hardly microscopic. But I always feel like I'm a lost kid when I'm at a bar or club, with people my age or younger towering over me. So that, right away, is a confidence killer when trying to meet women. But here's the real kicker: I like tall women. In fact, I prefer somewhat butch women — Hilary Swank in Boys Don't Cry, Geena Davis in A League of Their Own — and this leads to the ancillary problem that many of the women I'm attracted to are lesbians and thus are not interested in me. But even the tall, butchy straight/bi girls tend to go for guys who are taller than them. Most women I talk to about why they fall for tall guys have a common theme: They are looking for someone who makes them feel secure.

That's what I want! Is it so damn wrong to want a woman to be protective of ME? I want to be held by a strong pair of lady arms! No, I'm not into super-muscle women, nor am I into hardcore dom/sub stuff. Why is my vanilla kink such an obstacle? What am I to do?

Below Their League

Most women prefer taller men — not tall men, just men who are taller than they are. It's a sad, unavoidable fact, BTL, one you'll have to accept (just as I had to accept that most men prefer women), and you'll have to search longer and harder for the lady/lady arms of your dreams. Not much else you can do about it.

I'm a bi 18 year old female. I can't cum during sex, I never have. Boys or girls it doesnt matter. I can get off by myself but with other people its just uncomfterable. Vagional penatration feels good but head or finger fucking is Not fun. I thought that it was just the people I was sleeping with. You know, age and a small town bla bla bla. I'm off to collage now and in a much biger city and nothing is better.

I Can't Cum

Off to collage, are we?

Here's something you may not know about vaginal penetration — besides how to spell "vaginal" and "penetration" — because it's not something that's typically covered in small-town, high-school sex-ed classes: You can touch yourself during vaginal intercourse. Whatever you're doing that's getting you off when you're alone, ICC, do that thing — touch yourself that way — whenever a sex partner is penistrating you vaginotionally.

And when you're enjoying sex without penistration — when someone is eating your pussy or fingering your pussy — give that person direction, i.e., put your hand over his hand, place a hand on the back of her head, and show them just how to touch you and/or eat you to create the sensations that are intense or focused enough to get you off.

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