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The Blotter

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D'oh!: A woman stopped by her mother's house for a routine check while her mother was out of town. The woman noticed someone had eaten six donuts that had been in the kitchen the day before. Upon inspecting the house, she found an unknown man, the presumed donut snatcher, under her mother's bed. When she returned with police, the suspect was gone, having effectively pulled off the greatest donut heist of all time.

Family Lovin': A distant family member ran up to his relative, punched her in the back, and yanked out her hair extensions. As he was leaving, he yelled, "Bitch, I am gonna bust your windows out. You ain't gonna have no windows in your car." He later informed the woman, "I know you be out. I am gonna get you. You better be watching."

Naked Mannequin: A man stole a pair of bib overalls from a store mannequin. He broke off the security tag and put the overalls on over his clothes. He then removed a matching jacket from the mannequin and slipped that on as well. The man was arrested outside the store. He was homeless.

Everything Must Go: A robber broke into a home and stole a CD player, speakers, telescope, Wolfgang Puck cooking set, fishing pole, model cars and airplanes, picture frames, microwave, heating pad, dishes, pots and pans, radio, foodstuffs, clothes, toaster, stereo, two TVs, DVD player, VCR player, VHS movies, set of vases, furniture, drugs (including Viagra), chair cushion covers and so on. He or she was considerate enough to leave the infrastructure of the house.

Dognapping: A pit bull was reported missing from a woman's fenced-in yard. It is suspected stolen, as it has never before demonstrated the athleticism to leap the fence or the mysticism to disappear into thin air. Pit bulls are valued on the black market for their fightin' skills.

MacGyver: A man, who may or may not have been a detective, showed up at another man's house with a door and demanded the resident accompany him to a nearby field. The wannabe detective pushed the man down and forced him to take off his shoes. He then compared the man's shoe to a shoe print that had been made on his kicked-down door. When the shoe prints didn't match, the detective became furious. The shoeless man's sister broke up the incident.

Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte Police Department.

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