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The Blotter


A HOLE IN ONE!: A woman called police to report that the side of her house had been damaged, and that one of the windows had been cracked. She told them that when she checked the damage, she found a golf ball lodged in the siding. She later found more golf balls in her yard.

IN CONS WE TRUST: A woman was approached by two men on the street who told her that she could double her money by talking to their friend inside a nearby building. For whatever reason, she believed them and withdrew $15,000 from her bank account. They told her that they'd watch her car while she was inside. Of course, there was no friend inside, and when she came out her car was gone. Shockingly, however, she wasn't robbed of the money she withdrew.

SMALL STUFF: During a five-day period earlier this month, there were seven trash fires in garbage cans or dumpsters, six reports of drivers not paying for their gas, eight reports of people stealing a 20-pack of beer, and four reports of mailboxes being destroyed.

THE CASE OF THE APOLOGETIC CROOK: Three friends were returning home from dinner when a man approached their car and demanded that they give him their money. Although he never brandished it, he claimed to have a gun. He took $185 from them, but before he left he said he was very sorry for robbing them, and told them he was unemployed and owed child support.

STORMY FORECAST: A man was arrested for a crime recently and was put in the back of a squad car by officers. The car's radio was on, with the program's host going on and on about the weather. The arrestee couldn't take it any longer, freaked out, and bashed on the windows and doors until they were damaged.

WHITE NOISE: A man who was obsessed with a woman harassed her by calling her over 80 times. He told her that he was coming to get her. When those threats didn't do the trick, he faxed her 35 sheets of blank paper.

QUOTE OF THE WEEK: A call to a woman from a man on whom she has a restraining order: Bitch, I'm going to start trippin' again!

LEWD LAWN SERVICE: A man woke up one morning to find the word "fag" written on his lawn with weed killer.

OUR EVIL PRESIDENT: No, this isn't about Dubya, but rather the president of a local neighborhood association, who took a large chunk of his residents' dues and spent the money on merchandise for himself.

Blotter items are taken from the files of the Charlotte Police Department.

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