I get a lot of e-mails from readers asking me where they should go to meet people. But I'm a nightlife columnist, not a dating service. The best advice I can give you is to just go out -- whether you go to the grocery store or to a bar, you're going to meet people. The trick is meeting someone you're attracted to.
But do you ever wonder why in a crowd of people, there are few strangers that you instinctively feel a magnetic pull to? What sparks that initial attraction reaction we have toward certain people, but not others? Is there a chemical formula in our pheromones left off the periodic table? ... And why are some attractions alcohol-induced?
I asked some people out at a bar this question, and got so many different responses I feel like I could write a thesis on attraction. So, here is my synopsis ...
First thing's first -- What's your type? Find your type of bar, and perhaps you'll find the type of person you are attracted to within it.
It makes sense that a person is attracted to someone via a smell they radiate ... we are animals after all. Think about it: Dogs use their sense of smell to detect which bitches are in heat. I bet guys wish they had that ability, but for opposite purposes. Now, with the smoking ban in effect, perhaps we can better sniff one another out.
And some people go out to a bar like a hunter into the woods because they get off on the thrill of the hunt. I call this hawking ... a form of hunting live prey using the eyes. If you are getting eye-fucked by someone at a bar, then you become the prey. In response, you can either run or flirt back.
But when you're hunting in a cesspool, you may end up swimming in the shallow end. Not too many people go to a bar in search of Mr. or Ms. Right. They're looking for Right Now ... and that attraction is usually based on attractiveness, instead of personality. And a lot of these hunters wear beer goggles rather than camouflage.
When it comes to mating in bars, is attraction a sixth sense?