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Pregnant wife freaked out by his kink

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My wife and I have been married for a few years and are expecting our first child. I'm really into the idea of being sprayed with my wife's breast milk. The other night, she was fretting about when her boobs are going to start leaking. This seemed like a good time to bring it up, so I told her about my newly discovered lactation fetish. She freaked out — her comments were along the lines of "Gross!" and "That's not what that's for!" This is something I'd really like to explore, but I don't know how to reapproach the subject.

Man Into Lactation Kink

Not all pregnant women, however thrilled they are about having children, are excited about — much less excited by — the physical changes that come with pregnancy. So you might wanna keep your mouth shut until your wife has some time to get comfortable with her new boobs, MILK, and their new milk-producing superpowers.

Once the kid is out and the milk is in and your wife has fully recovered from the birth experience and you start fucking again ... you should probably keep keeping your mouth shut. The wife won't have forgotten that conversation, I promise you, and if she comes to see her breast milk as a bodily fluid like so many others, i.e., one of those fluids that adults sometimes share during sex, perhaps she'll warm to breast-milk splatter play.

"Before I had a baby," said a new mother I shared your letter with, "I would've had the same reaction — gross! The idea of sexualizing a bodily secretion that's designed solely for my infant? That seems a bit taboo. But now that I've had a baby, my reaction would be somewhat different."

How so?

"It can be a challenge to feel intimate after childbirth and as sleep-deprived new parents," said the new mom. "So I'd perhaps shrug and summon my new mom mantra: Whatever works."

I'm a 31-year-old lesbian. My girlfriend is in her 30s, and I've never had better sex than the sex I'm having with her. When I try to talk to her about this, she gets anxious and makes self-deprecatory comments. I want to be with her for the long haul — our dreams fit together — I just need to figure out how to communicate with her about how great our sex is. Got any advice?

Communication Breakdown

Yeah, CB, I've got some advice for you: Shut the fuck up.

I had this awesome new boyfriend once, and the sex was so freaking great that I felt compelled to communicate with him about how great it was. "This is so great," I would tell him. "Let's try to figure out where all this greatness is coming from!" But he didn't enjoy talking about sex — particularly while we were having sex — and he got so annoyed with my attempts to figure out where all this greatness was coming from that he eventually asked/advised/ordered me to shut the fuck up.

Odds are that your girlfriend will learn to relax and open up about sex, like my boyfriend did. But in the meantime, try to resist the urge to lesbian this thing into the ground by communicating it to death.

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