Sex & Love » Savage Love

Kinky Boys

Sharing is caring, in some cases

by

comment

I am a bi married father who recently fell on hard times. In order to make rent, I posted a few Craigslist ads, and now I occasionally suck dick for money. I don't intend to tell my wife, but I'm getting frequent STI tests. I'm kind of freaked out by how not freaked out I am. I mean, sucking 15 cocks for cash just to make rent seems pretty extreme, but aside from some low-level shame, I feel okay about it. Do you think regular people occasionally do this? Should I feel bad?

Paying Bills Regularly

Tons of stories were written at the height of the Great Recession about average people doing sex work to make ends meet, PBR. So lots of "regular people" have done sex work. (And sex workers? They're regular people, too.) And while I don't think you should feel bad, PBR, I do think you should tell the wife. Regular STI testing will only let you know that you've caught an STI, if you should ever catch one — it doesn't immunize you against catching an STI. So your wife, if you're having sex with her, too, has a right to know where the rent money is coming from.

A friend of mine who indulged my foot fetish (let me jack off while looking at and fondling her feet) while we were dating mentioned recently that lots of women would be up for indulging it for the right price. I replied, "Well, sure, but you can't just walk up to women on the street and be like, 'Hey, can I jack off to your feet for a hundred bucks?'" She said, "The internet, duh." My question: Is it illegal to offer money for such services online? What kind of risk would I be running if I ran an ad that hinted at what I'm interested in without getting too explicit?

Cash For Toes

The risk of being busted for an ad like that — particularly if there's no explicit offer of cash in exchange for sexual services — is low, CFT, but not nonexistent. Busting consenting adult sex workers and johns is easier than catching thieves, rapists and murderers, and it all but guarantees a police department some positive coverage on the local evening news. But the risk, again, is pretty small, and the rewards — for a foot fetishist — would be pretty great.

Just remember the escort-ad dodge: You're paying someone for their time — for their companionship — and whatever happens during that time is between two consenting adults.

My boyfriend, "Jack," is into pretty intense bondage (in addition to the vanilla sex we have all the time). Some light bondage with sex is fine, but I don't like the kind of bondage he does because it's way too much for me—and we can't exactly have sex when he's in layers of latex gear, hooded and gagged, strapped down inside a coffin-like "bondage box" with the lid closed and padlocked shut. We don't have that kind of gear, but he knows some older guys who do. I'm uncomfortable with the idea of him going over to play with these men without me there, but I find these bondage sessions really tedious. I also don't like feeling pressured to get tied up myself by two guys that I like well enough but don't find attractive at all. Is letting him go over there without me the only workable solution?

Jack In The Box

Yup.

Add a comment