At the beginning of this semester when we were both moving into the dorm, my roommate saw this guy who lives on the floor above us and was like, "He's such a hottie." I thought the guy was cute also but not really what I typically go for. Anyway, we met the guy a while later at this mixer thing and then my roommate got his number. She started hanging around on his hall trying to get to know his friends and stuff. I guess she came on too strong. The guy didn't seem interested in her, so nothing ever happened. Anyway, a couple of months passed and my roommate started stalking someone else, a guy who lives down the hall from us. I'd forgotten about our friend upstairs until I ran into him at a party. He told me that he never liked my roommate because she was too pushy.
So anyway, we ended up hooking up -- in his room, not mine. We've seen each other three times since then, but I haven't told my roommate about it. Now I'm all nervous. I know that she is going to hate me once she finds out what's happening. Is it wrong of me to secretly date a guy that my friend once had the hots for? -- Cruising for Trouble
OK, so maybe Dorm Dude isn't exactly the best choice for you to date, given his history with your (obviously deranged) roommate. But we never go for the best choice, now do we? We always want what we shouldn't, and this guy's history probably makes him all the hotter. Luckily, it's pretty clear here that your roommate has no real claim to Dorm Dude. You should, though, come clean about the fling. See above note (re: deranged) and be prepared for some fallout.
Dear Karma Cleanser:
I'm losing my mind. I can't stop thinking about my ex. It's like when you wash a red shirt in with the white socks and everything turns that nasty pink color. My crazy thoughts are starting to seep into everything I do. This whole thing started after our very bad breakup at the beginning of this year. I don't know what happened. Help!-- I Think I'm Paranoid
First, buy some bleach. Wash the pink out of those socks. If it doesn't come out, throw the socks away. Fold up the red shirt and store it in a drawer somewhere. Take charge of your own dirty laundry. In other words, you have the power to control your thoughts. Or, better still, lose the clothes all together ... the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.
Been bad? Tell the Karma Cleanser who's been naughty and nice. firstname.lastname@example.org.