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The DC Hospital Association doesn't keep track of how often its hospitals go after patients who cannot pay, but as David Sparks, Chief Financial Officer of Providence Hospital, puts it, "Collections happen every day and every week. It's part of the standard process."

In the end, says Dr. Quentin Young, there's a good chance Ashcroft will have to pay much of the money he owes in some capacity, or face a lien on everything he owns. The fact is, according to Roger Whelan, a resident scholar at the American Bankruptcy Institute and a former bankruptcy judge, medical bills attributed to a lack of insurance or insufficient coverage are a leading reason why a record 1.7 million bankruptcies occurred in this country last year.

As for the real Ashcroft, he'll never know the terrifying dilemma of his alter ego -- a dilemma experienced by millions of Americans throughout the country every day -- because he's a high ranking official in the Bush Administration and probably has that impressive federal health plan, or one similar to it. (A Justice Dept. spokesman said that Ashcroft is insured but did not know whether he was on the federal plan.) Of course, it's the same administration, of which Ashcroft is such an integral part, that has been so opposed to expanding health insurance to all people, regardless of age, employment status or economic well being.

Ironically it's Ashcroft's own health insurance that is saving him -- not only now, but once he gets the bill.

Dan Frosch is a freelance journalist based in New York City. He's been on staff at the Los Angeles Times, The Source magazine, and most recently the Santa Fe Reporter.