DIARY OF A MAD BLACK WOMAN Watching this adaptation of Tyler Perry's popular stage play is akin to channel surfing between showings of Soul Food and Nutty Professor II: The Klumps - with an occasional flip over to The Jeffersons for good measure. Gorgeous Kimberly Elise (The Manchurian Candidate) gets to display her acting chops as Helen McCarter, who's stunned when her husband of 18 years, a prominent Atlanta lawyer (Steve Harris), demands a divorce and forcibly throws her out of their mansion to make room for his gold-digging girlfriend (Lisa Marcos). Dejected, depressed and distraught, Helen moves back to her childhood home in the hood, where she's taken in by her grandmother Medea. It takes the support of her family and her new boyfriend (Shemar Moore) to help her get back on track, but ultimately she must come to terms with her own conflicted emotions before she can truly move forward. A huge hit with Afro-American audiences, Perry's play has been adapted (by the author himself) into a movie that's overflowing with positive Christian ideals as well as an honest assessment of the intrinsic desire for seeking retribution versus the spiritual need for giving absolution. In this respect, the movie's emotionally satisfying (if a bit simplistic), yet Perry dilutes its potency by casting himself in the roles of Medea, the gun-wielding, easily excitable grandmother, and her brother Joe, a flatulent senior citizen constantly leering at women when he's not busy smoking dope. Perry plays these sitcom roles in the broadest terms possible, and while some of the resultant moments are modestly amusing, they severely disrupt the heartfelt story that exists at the movie's center. 1/2
Current Releases
ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13 A favorite of critics and cultists alike, John Carpenter's 1976 Assault On Precinct 13 was a nifty little "B" flick about an LA street gang that descends upon a police station with the sole purpose of wiping out everyone inside. This flashy update is a competent but entirely generic action opus in which it's a group of rogue cops who attack the precinct in order to kill a captured crime lord whose testimony would put them behind bars. Laurence Fishburne plays the cool-under-fire kingpin, who reluctantly teams up with an honest officer (Ethan Hawke) to ensure his own survival. Expect few surprises from yet another needless remake.
THE AVIATOR This sprawling biopic about Howard Hughes (played by Leonardo DiCaprio), the notorious billionaire-industrialist-producer-flyboy, employs all the cinematic razzle-dazzle we've come to expect from Martin Scorsese, yet there's an added layer of excitement as the eternal cineaste finally gets to step back in time via his meticulous recreations of the sights and sounds of Old Hollywood (look for Cate Blanchett in a show-stealing turn as Katharine Hepburn). Still, the behind-the-scenes movie material takes a back seat to other aspects of Hughes' life - namely, his adventures in the field of aviation and his lifelong battle with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. At its best, the film is a stirring tale about a man whose inner drive allowed him to climb ever higher and higher, grazing the heavens before his inner demons seized the controls and forced the inevitable, dreary descent. 1/2
BEING JULIA It's not entirely accurate to state that Annette Bening is the show, the whole show, and nothing but the show, but let's just say that without her presence, the curtain would fall a lot faster on this adaptation of W. Somerset Maugham's book Theatre. She's awfully fun to watch as she whirlwinds her way through this backstage yarn (set in 1938 London) about an aging actress whose young lover (Shaun Evans) might be using her. The film's greatest strength rests in its intricate character dynamics (aided by such luminaries as Jeremy Irons and Michael Gambon); its biggest flaw comes from the miscasting of the bland Evans, whose flat performance makes it impossible to believe that the dynamic Julia would fall so strongly for such a drip.
COACH CARTER This works the usual underdog cliches fairly well as it tells the true story of Ken Carter (Samuel L. Jackson), a high school basketball coach in California who manages to turn a team that won only four games during its previous season into a statewide powerhouse. But at the height of their success, Carter elects to bench the entire team once he discovers that most of his players are performing poorly in their classes. Carter's selfless actions against a failed education system register even when the movie surrounding him turns on itself: All pertinent points are made after a full two hours, but the picture drags on for another 20 minutes simply so viewers can be treated to a climactic Big Game. Ultimately, Coach Carter's sincerity gets trumped by its savvy at milking the sports formula for all it's worth. 1/2
CONSTANTINE Based on the DC Comics/Vertigo series Hellblazer, this disappointment casts Keanu Reeves as John Constantine, a man with the ability to recognize the angels and demons that walk the earth in human form. Yet as he goes about his business of wiping out as many of the demonic "half-breeds" as possible (in an attempt to "buy" his way into Heaven), he realizes that there's a seismic shift occurring in the underworld, and the only way he can get to the bottom of the mystery is to join forces with a police detective (Rachel Weisz) investigating the apparent suicide of her psychic twin sister. Because it's an exhaustive exercise to keep abreast of the story's seemingly haphazard developments, Constantine ends up resembling nothing so much as a punctured tire with a slow leak, letting all the air seep out until what's finally left is flat and fairly ineffectual.
ELEKTRA Talk about a house of flying daggers: The multiplex is filled with them once Marvel's blade-wielding superheroine springs into action in this spin-off of 2003's Daredevil (in which she appeared as the sightless superhero's romantic interest). But while this lady in red often kicks it into high gear, the movie itself rarely moves beyond a stroll. The story finds the assassin-for-hire (Jennifer Garner) balking when her latest assignment requires her to kill a single dad (Goran Visnjic) and his teenage daughter (Kirsten Prout, whose annoying performance does the film no favors). Elektra elects to protect them instead, which in turn pits her against an evil organization known as The Hand. Inexplicably, no one ever deadpans, "Talk to The Hand," but then again, a sense of humor is noticeably missing throughout. 1/2
HIDE AND SEEK Robert De Niro, in full paycheck-gorging mode, is miscast as David Callaway, a New York psychologist who, after his wife (Amy Irving) commits suicide, moves upstate with their traumatized 9-year-old daughter Emily (Dakota Fanning). Still struggling to cope with the tragedy, Emily invents an imaginary friend named Charlie, and a subsequent string of disasters leads David to wonder whether Emily suffers from a split personality, whether another person is manipulating his daughter, or whether there's a supernatural presence in their new home. It's becoming increasingly rote to review junky, generic thrillers like this one: Critics would do well to simply cut-and-paste their slams of last year's Secret Window (this film's doppelganger) and leave it at that. 1/2
HITCH A warm and witty comedy that unfortunately runs itself into the ground, Hitch benefits immeasurably from the presence of Will Smith, who may or may not be a great actor but who is most assuredly a great movie star. There's something to be said for effortless magnetism, and in that respect, Smith has more in common with the sophisticated comedians of the past than the coarse jokesters of today. He's at turns sly, suave and sexy as Alex "Hitch" Hitchens, who earns a living by advising other men how to land the woman of their dreams. Yet even as he tries to pair up a clumsy accountant (Kevin James) with a supermodel (Amber Valletta), he unexpectedly finds his own attention drawn to a gossip columnist (Eva Mendes). Viewers who go with the flow will gladly put reality on pause in order to enjoy this movie's modest pleasures - it's just a shame the picture reverts to rigid formula in its final half-hour. 1/2
HOTEL RWANDA Set in 1994 Rwanda, this powerful film takes place during the 100-day period when nearly one million of that country's Tutsis were slaughtered by the Hutu extremists. Clearly, Hotel Rwanda is about international indifference and liberal ineffectualness, and the movie reverberates with such topical force (Sudan, anyone?) that the ink is still drying on its condemnation of a planet that operates with blinders firmly attached. Yet for all its indignant ire, the movie is more than anything a humanist saga, and it's in this area where it draws its greatest power. Don Cheadle exudes quiet authority as Paul Rusesabagina, the Hutu hotel manager who risked everything to save over a thousand Tutsi civilians from falling under the machete. 1/2
MILLION DOLLAR BABY The best picture of 2004 is an instant classic, much like director-producer-star Clint Eastwood's Unforgiven. But whereas that revisionist Western deconstructed genre conventions, turning them inside out to expose the inherent contradictions and compromises, this movie leaves many of the cliches intact, deriving its power not by upending them but by burrowing so deeply that it feels like we're witnessing familiar sights for the very first time. Eastwood stars as a gym owner who's urged by his only friend (Morgan Freeman) to train a young woman (Hilary Swank) determined to make it as a boxer, yet what starts out as a familiar (if brilliantly told) story eventually changes course and emerges as a profound and moving filmgoing experience. There's very little about this movie that feels extraneous - it's tight, taut storytelling, anchored by three astonishing performances and helmed by a man still able to teach Hollywood's young punks a thing or two.
SIDEWAYS Movies in which characters hit the road in search of adventure and end up discovering themselves are nothing new to American film - in fact, they're an integral part of our cinematic heritage - yet this one is idiosyncratic enough to stand apart from the pack. Miles (Paul Giamatti), a chronically depressed high school teacher, and Jack (Thomas Haden Church), a has-been actor about to get married, decide to book passage to California's Santa Ynez Valley to tour the local wineries; while there, they get involved with two women (Virginia Madsen and Sandra Oh) who force them to reconsider their present outlooks on life. It should be noted that this lovely motion picture should itself be approached like a fine wine: Uncork it, give it time to breathe, and then luxuriate in its rich, heady flavor. It also ages nicely, holding up beautifully under repeat viewings.
THE WEDDING DATE We expect TV stars trying to make the transition to the big screen to find themselves saddled with subpar material, but this one takes that notion to the extreme. To say that the script for The Wedding Date is bottom-of-the-barrel would be too kind; this one was already decomposing under a mountain of mulch before Will & Grace's Debra Messing fished it out. Messing plays a woman whose neurotic impulses are meant to be endearing but who instead comes off as something of a pill. Required to fly to England to attend the wedding of her loathsome sister (Amy Adams), she can't stand the thought of arriving alone, so she spends $6,000 to hire a male prostitute (Dermot Mulroney) to pretend to be her boyfriend. This was clearly inspired by the success of such Brit-flavored confections as Four Weddings and a Funeral and Bridget Jones' Diary - and the comparisons end there.
OPENS FRIDAY:
BRIDE & PREJUDICE: Aishwarya Rai, Martin Henderson.
CURSED: Christina Ricci, Jesse Eisenberg.
DIARY OF A MAD BLACK WOMAN: Kimberly Elise, Tyler Perry.
MAN OF THE HOUSE: Tommy Lee Jones, Christina Milian.