Current Releases

THE FOOT FIST WAY Certainly, we here at CL want to promote and celebrate regional filmmaking whenever possible, but not at the expense of credibility. To be sure, somebody appreciated this low-budget comedy co-written by buddies Jody Hill (who also directed), Danny McBride and Ben Best (all products of the North Carolina School of the Arts), and that somebody would be Will Ferrell, who loved this film so much that his production company picked it up and he was able to secure a limited national release for it. The star's interest is hardly surprising, since The Foot Fist Way basically plays like a Will Ferrell vehicle without Will Ferrell. Here, the central man-child is Fred Simmons (McBride), a doltish Tae Kwon Do instructor who runs his own martial arts school in a Concord, N.C., strip mall. Fred is married to a slatternly wife (Mary Jane Bostic) prone to copying her bare boobs and butt on the office Xerox machine (and who gets off the script's funniest line: "I was really drunk; like Myrtle Beach drunk"), and his misplaced self-esteem crumbles after she admits to giving her boss a hand job. Fred takes his aggression out on his students (most of whom are kids), and even his moment of triumph – getting a Tae Kwon Do champ-turned-B-movie-actor (Best) to visit his school – ends badly. Audience members satisfied with a comedy that offers a handful of ever-so-mild smiles will enjoy this, but anyone on the prowl for sharp satire or even a belly laugh or two will be sorely disappointed by a film whose smugness is never justified by its frat-house humor. *1/2

GET SMART Get Smart, the TV sitcom that aired from 1965 to 1970, was created by Mel Brooks and Buck Henry, and these legendary funnymen are listed in the credits of this spin-off as "creative consultants." The word is that neither actually had any real input in this movie, which probably explains why major facets differ from what fans fondly recall about the show. But in at least one respect, there's a striking similarity: Both have no problem providing the laughs. In the hit series, Don Adams starred as bumbling agent Maxwell Smart while Barbara Feldon played his more competent partner, Agent 99. Working for a government unit known as C.O.N.T.R.O.L., the secret agents had their hands full protecting the world from the rival outfit K.A.O.S. In this update, which seems as much a James Bond spoof as a Get Smart homage, the plot similarly finds Steve Carell's Maxwell Smart and Anne Hathaway's Agent 99 out to stop K.A.O.S. head Siegfried (Terence Stamp). All of the performers (including Alan Arkin and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson) are given a scene or two in which to shine, although most of the best set pieces belong to the leads. There's a ballroom sequence involving Maxwell and a hefty dance partner that's surprisingly sweet-natured – for once, a film honors an overweight person rather than simply making fun – while Agent 99 gets off a monologue that culminates in a sentimental mention of her mom. And therein lies much of the appeal of this big-screen Get Smart: In between the gags and the action scenes, there's an identifiable human element at work, and this empathy prevents this from being just another big, dumb summer comedy. ***

THE HAPPENING The Happening starts off well before steadily traipsing downhill, and in that respect, it perfectly mirrors writer-director M. Night Shyamalan's career in this spooky vein. The Sixth Sense may have been a smash, but each subsequent film was less satisfying than the one which preceded it, leading all the way to his disastrous last film, Lady In the Water. The Happening at least represents a step up from that debacle. Opening in NYC, the first scenes show countless people suddenly become zombie-like before proceeding to take their own lives. It's soon revealed that this phenomenon is spreading to all major cities throughout the northeast chamber of the country; this includes Philadelphia, where a high school science teacher (Mark Wahlberg) and his wife Alma (Zooey Deschanel) elect to leave town before the plague hits. Or is it a plague? No one has a definitive answer, and for a while, Shyamalan steadfastly refuses to give us any hints. It's during these early passages, when we're as baffled as the characters, that the film is at its strongest. But the self-appointed master of the last-minute twist here elects to reveal the mystery somewhere around the halfway mark. It's such a threadbare revelation – and a rather silly one, to boot – that the movie then ambles forward with nothing else left to say. As for Shyamalan's usual on-screen appearance, it proves to be the most clever aspect of the movie. I don't dare ruin the surprise, but if you don't figure it out while watching the flick, be sure to carefully check the cast list in the end credits. Unfortunately, when a movie's best bit arrives during the closing credits, we're all in trouble. **

THE INCREDIBLE HULK Is it just me, or is anyone else hankering to go out and rent a handful of episodes from the old TV series The Incredible Hulk? Sure, every show pretty much resembled the others, but Bill Bixby was a smart choice to play the smart scientist, and in retrospect, it was downright comforting to have his rampaging alter ego played by an oversized actor spray-painted in green. In this age, moviemakers have opted to keep Dr. Jekyll but do away with Mr. Hyde, replacing him with a CGI creation. The results were disastrous in Ang Lee's 2003 Hulk: A dull flick was made even less appealing by a green giant who looked like a video game blip most of the time and Gumby on steroids the rest of the time. This attempt to save the franchise (new director, new writer, new cast) is clearly a superior follow-up, even if the computers still can't quite capture the misunderstood monster on film. The Hulk looks better here than in the '03 model, but there's still a plasticity about him that removes the behemoth – and, consequently, our rooting interest – from whatever action is occurring on screen. That's a shame, because Edward Norton does his part by providing Bruce Banner with the requisite sense of torn humanity, and the film is filled with imaginative asides for fans of the comic book and/or TV series. The Incredible Hulk is a more-than-serviceable fantasy flick, lacking in the sort of existential angst that propelled the Spider-Man trilogy and Superman Returns but filled with frenetic action that should satisfy the Marvel faithful. But on the scale of superhero flicks, it falls a bit short. In other words, don't expect Iron Man or Batman to be green with envy. **1/2

INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL Let's try to put this in perspective, shall we? On the Scale of Cinematic Achievements, the eagerly awaited Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull places dead last among the four big-screen Indy adventures. Given the quality of its predecessors, however, that can hardly be construed as a smackdown. It's now 1957, and World War II has since been replaced by the Cold War, meaning that our intrepid archeologist-professor-swashbuckler (Harrison Ford) now has his hands full battling Commies instead of Nazis. The Russkies, led by a slinky ball of black-haired menace named Irina Spalko (Cate Blanchett), are after an object – a crystal skull, of course – that will aid them in their quest for world domination. Standing in their way is Indy and his gang – chiefly, old flame Marion Ravenwood (three cheers for the return of Raiders of the Lost Ark's Karen Allen) and a brash young greaser (Shia LaBeouf). Longtime fans of the series will find the references to past films delightful, and they'll similarly be pleased to find Spielberg once again at his most limber: The director hasn't made a film this light and carefree in a long time. The first two-thirds of the film are such a blast that it makes the final section – a CGI blowout low on thrills – feel like even more like a downer. But this is really about one character – and the actor who plays him. After frittering away the past 11 years in poor projects, the 65-year-old Ford again plays a role that fits him like a glove, and his enthusiasm and athleticism serve to further fuel our own glee for the project. ***

IRON MAN Given their general status as popcorn flicks heavier on the decadent calories than on the nutritional value, I'm always pleasantly surprised at how much care Hollywood studios take when it comes to casting their superheroes in franchise flicks. With Iron Man, Paramount settled on an actor who turned out to be both unexpected and just right: Robert Downey Jr. is excellent in the film, and it owes much of its success to him. Centering on the Marvel Comics character created back in 1963, Iron Man shows how swaggering, self-centered inventor and industrialist Tony Stark (Downey), the U.S. military's chief supplier of weapons of mass destruction, transforms into an armored superhero dedicated to fighting for peace (this is an even more liberal-minded superhero film than Batman Begins). Stark's difficulties while perfecting his Iron Man persona provide the movie with many of its most amusing moments, as do the interludes between Stark and his faithful right-hand woman Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow). Indeed, the expository material is so engaging that the climactic battle between Iron Man and a villain known as Iron Monger comes as a massive letdown: After adding such a personal touch to the proceedings – even in earlier scenes involving CGI work – director Jon Favreau turns in a chaotic action climax that could have been lifted from any soulless Jerry Bruckheimer endeavor. Still, even this last-inning letdown can't tarnish Iron Man's overall appeal. Just as Tony Stark needs a device to keep his heart pumping, Iron Man requires Downey's presence to keep the heart of this franchise alive. ***

KUNG FU PANDA Kung Fu Panda isn't notable for what it is as much as it's notable for what it isn't. It isn't obnoxious. It isn't soulless. It isn't packed to the rafters with potty humor. And it isn't made solely for the ADD-afflicted. In short, it isn't like the majority of today's non-Pixar animated features. The narrative is strictly formulaic, but the delight is in how it wraps its familiar messages of acceptance and self-confidence in a provocative visual scheme that's always pleasant to absorb. In that respect, it has more in common with Dr. Seuss than the dubiously titled Dr. Seuss' Horton Hears a Who! Jack Black employs his patented schtick as an overweight panda who longs to become a martial arts expert, but it suits this story just fine. As the vicious snow leopard who seeks to claim the high-and-mighty title of Dragon Warrior, Deadwood's Ian McShane effectively provides guttural menace. And while the actors who provide the voices for the legendary martial arts outfit The Furious Five aren't given enough to do (Angelina Jolie, Seth Rogen, David Cross, Lucy Liu and especially poor Jackie Chan are the victims), all is forgiven whenever the character of Master Shifu appears on screen. It's a sizable part, meaning that we're constantly treated to Dustin Hoffman's quirky take on the role of a diminutive red panda who serves as mentor to the other animals. Hoffman has played a remarkable array of characters over his 41-year film career – Benjamin Braddock, Ratzo Rizzo, Dorothy Michaels, etc. – but I never thought he'd be tackling Mr. Miyagi. I was wrong. ***

THE LOVE GURU If I had ever entertained the notion that Mike Myers would some day make another movie as awful as the infamous live-action version of The Cat In the Hat, I might have opted for early retirement long before the fact. Yet here comes The Love Guru, and it matches that Dr. Seuss bastardization step for step when it comes to thinking up evil ways to torture audience members. I daresay that even a splinter in the eyeball would be less painful than sitting through this debacle. Myers, who also co-wrote what we'll loosely refer to as the screenplay, stars as Guru Pitka, an American-born, Indian-raised spiritual leader who's miffed that he constantly places second to Deepak Chopra when it comes to the popularity of self-help gurus. Pitka is given a golden opportunity to excel when he's hired by Toronto Maple Leafs owner Jane Bullard (Jessica Alba, and you know you're in trouble when she's one of the more tolerable aspects of a movie) to patch matters up between the hockey team's star player, Darren Roanoke (Romany Malco), and his wife Prudence (Meagan Good), who lately has been stepping out with the enormously endowed Los Angeles Kings goalie Jacques "Le Coq" Grande (Justin Timberlake). And yes, every time Le Coq pulls out le cock, we predictably hear a thud as it hits the floor. In fact, predictability is a rampant problem with The Love Guru, as a substantial amount of gags can be guessed before they even finish coagulating. That's not to say every joke is apparent before the fact, as witnessed by ones involving copulating elephants, urine-saturated mops and the term "monkey mustard." An embarrassment, to say the least. *

MONGOL It wouldn't exactly be accurate to tag this historical drama I Was a Teenage Conqueror, but this Oscar nominee for Best Foreign Language Film (Kazakhstan's first such nod) spends next to no time on the Genghis Khan who would become legendary for invading and occupying much of Asia during the first quarter of the 13th century. Instead, Mongol is reminiscent of movies like Young Mr. Lincoln, The Motorcycle Diaries, Young Winston, and, uh, Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd in that they all focus on the early years that helped shape and define their protagonists. In this case, we witness the brutal conditions which Temudjin (his real name) had to endure as he fought his way to his lofty place in the world. After his father is poisoned, 9-year-old Temudjin (played as a child by Odnyam Odsuren and as an adult by Tadanobu Asano) finds much of the next two decades spent either chased, caged or forced into slave labor by his ruthless countrymen. He receives help along the way from strangers who soon become friends, but he draws most of his strength from his wife Borte (Khulan Chuluun), with whom he's shared a special bond ever since they first met as children. It goes without saying that Asano makes a more credible Genghis Khan than John Wayne, who essayed the role in 1956's The Conqueror (yes, unbelievable, but look it up). Yet the real star here is director and co-writer Sergei Bodrov, who largely turns his back on CGI effects and creates stirring battle scenes the old-fashioned way, by orchestrating actors and animals across open landscapes. Somewhere, David Lean is smiling. ***

PRICELESS The women of Sex and the City look as chaste as Mother Teresa when compared to Irene, the protagonist of this French comedy. Promoted by the studio as the modern-day counterpart to Breakfast at Tiffany's Holly Golightly (though the film itself evokes Ernst Lubitsch or Preston Sturges more than Blake Edwards), Irene (played by Audrey Tautou) floats around the French Riviera looking for wealthy men to pamper and provide for her. Her current suitor Jacques (Vernon Dobtcheff) has agreed to marry her, but out of boredom, she has a fling with a young millionaire named Jean (Gad Elmaleh). But it's a case of mistaken identity: Jean is actually a bartender at the resort, and Irene is furious after Jacques dumps her and Jean (now unemployed for sleeping with a guest) is unable to provide for her. Hopelessly smitten, Jean remains in her orbit even after she lands another suitor (Jacques Spiesser), and once he finds himself the companion of an older woman (Marie-Christine Adam) who mistakes him for a gigolo, Irene softens and begins to teach this novice the rules of the game. The P.C. Patrol can feel free to tut-tut at the characters' morals, but Priceless is such a charming romantic comedy in the fairy-tale vein (a la Pretty Woman) that any ill will would be seriously misplaced. After being drained of all personality for her role in The Da Vinci Code, Tautou regains her Amelie effervescence, while The Valet's Elmaleh again displays an easygoing rapport with his own comic intuitions. Add to this frothy mix some gorgeous shots of the French Riviera, and Priceless proves to be a steal at any cost. ***

SEX AND THE CITY Threatened fanboys on the Internet have been driven insane by the mere existence of this film (how dare anyone make a movie centering on women instead of superheroes or Sandler?), but anyone who's ever bothered to watch the acclaimed HBO series realizes that it need not be the exclusive property of women and homosexuals. Certainly, with its frequent look at eye-popping fashions, it can qualify as female-oriented porn in the same way that Transformers hardware might cause erections in fanboys, but at its heart, the show was about the necessity of enduring friendships and how they can serve as an anchor in a roiling sea of emotional upheavals. In this sequel-of-sorts, Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker) is preoccupied with her upcoming marriage to longtime beau Mr. Big (Chris Roth), Samantha (Kim Cattrall) valiantly resists the call of the penis as she tries to remain faithful to her boyfriend (Jason Lewis), Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) struggles with issues of infidelity as they relate to her husband (David Eigenberg), and Charlotte (Kristin Davis) is content with her life as a wife and mother. Superior to most of the year's rom-coms, this works because its ability to mix real-world issues with reel-world fantasies provides it with both gravity and buoyancy. There are a few missteps – the new character of Louise, Carrie's personal assistant, reveals that without any showstopping tunes to hide behind, Dreamgirls Oscar winner Jennifer Hudson might not possess an ounce of acting talent – but for the most part, this is likely to satisfy faithful followers of the show, and even select newbies should enjoy this break away from the season's more clamorous offerings. ***

THE STRANGERS One of my cinematic pet peeves (and they are legion) is when a fellow scribe describes a motion picture as pointless. Despite the scarcity of story, or lack of depth among the characters, or general ineptitude on every level, the filmmakers had some sort of vision – some raison d'etre – for making their movie, and that alone means it has some sort of point. Now here comes The Strangers to test out my long-standing theory and risk turning me into a hypocrite. Is there a point to this anemic thriller in which a young couple (Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman) are terrorized in a secluded vacation home by three masked invaders? Maybe the point is to show how none of us are really safe from the evils of the outside world, even when we're in our own homes. That's a moldy premise that barely needs repeating: For starters, just the past two months alone have seen the theatrical release of Funny Games and the DVD release of the French import Them, both wielding identical plotlines. Or perhaps writer-director Bryan Bertino's only purpose was to scare the living hell out of audience members, a noble pursuit in this age of fright-free terror tales. But The Strangers isn't scary, only boring, and the final image shows that Bertino didn't even have the guts to follow the story to its logical end. His cop-out may not make the movie even more pointless, but it certainly makes it more insulting. *

WANTED Action films are by definition loud and chaotic, but here's one so hyperactive, it makes titles like Live Free or Die Hard and The Bourne Ultimatum seem as staid as Atonement by comparison. Based on the graphic novel series, Wanted initially feels like an unofficial remake of Fight Club, as cubicle nobody Wesley Gibson (James McAvoy, speaking of Atonement) narrates how he's been beaten down by his mundane, miserable existence (cheating girlfriend, obnoxious boss, dead-end job). Into his life walks not Tyler Durden but Fox (Angelina Jolie), a tattooed beauty who insists that he's been targeted for elimination by the same man (Thomas Kretschmann) who recently killed his father. Fox soon introduces Wesley to The Fraternity, a clandestine outfit made up entirely of assassins and led by the cordial Sloan (Morgan Freeman). Shucking aside any moral qualms rather quickly, Wesley joins the group, in the process learning that he possesses untapped skills that make him a natural for this line of work. Russian director Timur Bekmambetov, best known for the visually striking yet dramatically inert Nochnoi Dozor (Night Watch) and its sequels, has crafted a slam-bang feature that revels in its own ridiculousness: To criticize the movie's outlandish situations would be to miss the whole point of Bekmambetiv's exercise in excess. Still, the script's twists and turns aren't nearly as clever as writers Michael Brandt, Derek Haas and Chris Morgan pretend (the secret involving Wesley's dad is pretty transparent), and after a while, the movie's gleeful approach to nihilism proves wearying. **1/2

YOU DON'T MESS WITH THE ZOHAN It was Mae West who quipped, "When I'm good, I'm very, very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better." This film inspires a bastardization of that quote: When it's funny, it's very, very funny, but when it's bad, it's downright awful. That's a shame, because choice moments suggest that this could have been Adam Sandler's best comedy – not a Herculean feat, by any means, but after a career littered with the likes of Big Daddy and Little Nicky, we'll take what we can get. Sandler plays Zohan, an Israeli antiterrorist agent who tires of his violent lot in life and becomes a hair stylist in New York. As with most scattershot comedies, some gags score while others widely miss the mark. This one contains a greater success ratio than most Sandler flicks, but these humorous moments are still too few and far between, like Easter eggs hidden throughout a grassy field. Most of the time, we're forced to contend with elements that drag down most Sandler comedies: puerile humor aimed at 10-year-old boys, "gay-panic"-inspired discussions of penis sizes, and Sandler regular Rob Schneider again demonstrating that he possesses the comic instincts of Dick "West Virginia" Cheney. The final half-hour is especially ghastly, and as for the various cameos, they represent one squandered opportunity after another. And what's with the appearance of the wretched Mariah Carey? After watching her struggle through her agonizing scene, I was ready for Sandler to bring back the puerile penis jokes. **

OPENS WEDNESDAY, JULY 2:

HANCOCK: Will Smith, Charlize Theron.

KIT KITTREDGE: AN AMERICAN GIRL: Abigail Breslin, Joan Cusack.