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Bizarre crimes from Charlotte's police files (Aug. 1)

Watch that grip

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Withdrawal: An employee at a local bank alerted police after receiving a note from a customer telling her to do so. When officers arrived, they found a man who was scared for his life — and probably quite high. The man told the cops that he had been caught smoking crack that wasn't his earlier in the day. According to him, the owners of said crack drove him to the bank and told him he needed to withdraw enough money to pay for the drugs or they would kill him. The man didn't have any money — nor were cops very sympathetic to his cause.

Playing cop: An unknown man visited an apartment complex last week with the intention of forcing any undocumented immigrants on the premises out of their homes. Residents informed employees at the complex that a man was distributing flyers to any Hispanic residents he could find. The flyers stated that any residents who were in the country sans documentation would have to leave by August so that the apartment complex, which the man claimed to represent, could avoid fines. Police attorneys later decided that no criminal offense was committed as the man's actions did not fall under North Carolina's Ethnic Intimidation Statute.

Firm grip: A man who "felt like he had been assaulted" called police last week to find out if he had, in fact, been assaulted. After the man and a few others finished playing a basketball game, the two teams lined up and shook hands. The man decided to make the call after his hand been shaken a little too hard. No word on whether the cops took him seriously.

Burned: One 40-year-old woman realized last week that she has a lot to learn if she wants to get into the landlord business. Looking to rent a room in her home, the woman placed an ad in a newspaper. The man who replied simply told her his name was Omar, and she asked for no identification or paperwork. A couple of days after the man moved in, the woman found that "Omar" had moved out, taking her 50-inch flat-screen TV and Wii system with him.

Chair-y situation: Police responded to a trespassing call on Central Avenue after a man began camping out in front of a store. The manager at Charlotte Nails Academy told officers that she had banned the man from the property earlier in the week, yet he showed up anyway with a lawn chair and set up shop on the lawn. When police arrived, the man was sleeping in his chair. He was woken up and told to leave.

Threat of the Week: One needy extortionist called a 40-year-old woman last week and said, "If you don't buy me some Lebrons, I am going to shoot you up and those kids and your old-ass momma."

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