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Bizarre crime from Charlotte police files (Dec. 31)

Clueless crimes

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Greasy Neighbor: A 69-year-old woman living in the Honey Creek Senior Apartments filed a police report after someone in the complex refused to stop their odd and potentially dangerous behavior. The woman told officers the known suspect continuously sprinkles oil on the porch of the apartment complex, putting many of the fragile hips at the senior living center at risk.

You're Grounded: A woman was arrested for assault with a deadly weapon and damage to property after running a Dodge Magnum off the road on North Tryon Street last week. When police arrived, the woman admitted that she purposefully ran the victim off the road. She also confirmed to officers that the victim was, in fact, her son.

Here's My I.D.: Some unknown woman (or perhaps girl) threw a hissy fit in a west Charlotte convenience store last week after being asked for identification to buy alcohol. The cashier at the Quik Mart on Freedom Drive said the woman smashed a bottle of Fire Flask alcohol on the floor when he asked her for identification. It's not clear from the report where the liquor came from, however, as convenience stores are not allowed to sell whiskey in this state.

Chops: Someone broke into a home in east Charlotte last week and made off with a smile ... in their hands. According to the police report, the suspect walked into the home through an unlocked door and stole a wallet and a set of dentures before fleeing the scene. In an unrelated incident, a 68-year-old man reported that someone broke into his locked apartment in NoDa and stole $20 worth of Viagra.

Clueless: A 21-year-old woman filed a police report about a missing purse on a recent morning, but it's safe to assume she had been enjoying the night on which she lost it because she didn't know many details of how it went missing. The woman, who was hanging out on Montford Drive the previous night, told officers she may have left it in one of the two Uber cars she took that night, or in the taxi she took that night, or that she may have just dropped her purse right in the parking lot for all she knows.

I Earned It: Some pissed off employees at a south Charlotte pizza shop called police after an afternoon worth of tips disappeared from the counter. Witnesses said a man walked into Brooklyn Pizza Parlor at about 6:30 p.m. one evening and took the tip jar, containing an estimated $35 in cash, from the counter and walked out with it.

And That's Mine: Another suspect in south Charlotte last week had to work a little bit harder for their money. Some unknown suspect was apparently not interested in skimming an ATM for victims' card information, as has become popular these days, but instead found a way to remove the entire machine. The report states that someone stole the $5,200 ATM from its spot at a business park just off I-77.

Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department. All suspects are innocent until proven guilty.

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