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Delayed reaction: A 20-year-old man called police to his home in reference to an assault. He said he was woken up by someone stabbing him multiple times with a pair of metal scissors. Noticing the man wasn't bleeding, the officer dug for more details. Turns out the incident happened more than two months ago.

Attack of the pink panther: A 26-year-old woman said someone painted all the bricks on her home pink. She tried to remove the paint, but it wouldn't come off. She said she has no idea who could be responsible.

Brawling mamas: Two women got into a fight after a camera went missing. One woman claimed that the other woman – angry that her child's camera was missing – attacked her, jumped on her back and pushed her up against a brick wall. The other woman claimed the first woman started it by coming over to her house and grabbing her face. The first woman was treated at a hospital; the second had no injuries.

Quick nap: A man called police when he woke to find a man sleeping on his couch at 3:40 a.m. The offender was not believed to be breaking and entering, but just so drunk that he entered the wrong residence. Because who doesn't do that every once in a while, right?