Tis the season to go on some dates to holiday parties, drinking and being merry. For some it’s the time of year to take that big step toward the M-word (oh come on, you know what I mean — marriage). This week’s story is full of many lessons.
Kenya and Deon had been dating for about three years, and for the first time, he asked if he could go with her to her family’s home for the holidays. Kenya immediately said yes. After all, her family loved him, and she loved him, so there was no question that he’d be welcomed. A couple of days before they left for the mountains, they visit Deon’s aunt and partake in some eggnog. As they are drinking and cackling and being joyous, Deon remembers he left his cellphone in the car and runs outside to retrieve it. Deon’s aunt sees this as the prime opportunity to spill some tea. She leans over and whispers to Kenya: “He got you a ring. He is going to propose. The whole family gave him some money to get it.”
Nothing like a spoiler alert, huh? Thanks auntie.
So, of course, Kenya has to act like she doesn’t know, and now the whole reason behind why he wants to go home with her makes perfect sense. She is about to get engaged to the love of her life! Don't you just love the idea of love?
Fast forward to Christmas morning in the mountains with Kenya’s family. She waits until everyone has opened their gifts to open the one Deon got her. It’s in a big box. She shakes it to find it's lightweight, so to her that’s a good sign. She opens it up and pulls out a leather jacket. Kenya said she figured, maybe just maybe, Deon is a little sneaky and hid the ring inside the jacket. She checks the pockets. Nope. No ring there. Kenya realizes there is still stuff in the box and reaches in to pull out another coat, this one a different color but suede. I see you, Deon, trying to make sure your bae is warm.
She checks those pockets, but, again, no ring. Deon tells her there is something else in the box. She digs in to find a purse. She opens the purse, shakes it, checks the pockets, nothing, no ring. But ole Deon is pleased as punch with himself — he can’t stop smiling. Kenya said she was furious because she had told her parents and siblings that a proposal was going down that morning. Oops.
Hours go by, and still no proposal. Finally, Kenya said she couldn’t take it anymore and the minute she got Deon away from her family, she blurts out, “Where is my ring?! Where is my proposal?”
She said Deon looked puzzled and kept asking what ring, what proposal? WTF is she talking about?
Kenya explains to Deon that his aunt told her that he borrowed money from everyone to buy her a ring and was going to propose.
What did Deon do? She said he laughed and laughed and laughed. He fell out of the chair he was sitting in and laughed some more. Finally, he explains to her that he did borrow money, but it was for the jackets and the purse, not for a ring. He says his aunt had been on valium, drinking that eggnog, so she probably doesn’t remember what the hell he said when he asked for the money to begin with. Kenya said she eventually saw the humor in this situation, and Deon actually went and bought her a promise ring a few days later.
I see you Deon — you got it at them after-Christmas sales! Do you, bruh!
They never made it down the aisle, but did date for several more years. Let’s all do a collective awwwwwww, shall we?
The lesson here is, don’t put the cart before the horse. Never listen to someone who might not have the whole story, and for goodness' sake, don’t tell everybody else so you don’t end up with your face cracked even more. Happy holidays!
Have you had a good or bad dating experience that you want to share? Go ahead, shoot an email to firstname.lastname@example.org. We'll keep your identity a secret — just let us know what dating in the Queen City is really like!