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Bizarre crimes from Charlotte police files

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Dedication: A 33-year-old man filed a police report after a man threatened him over voice mail last week. He told officers that the suspect left him a message that stated, "Some sins are not forgiven. You need to get the belts on your truck changed, or I'm going to put a bullet in you." The victim had no idea the mechanic took his job so seriously when he dropped the truck off for a checkup.

cuckoo's nest: A police report was filed last week for a police officer after he was assaulted while in the line of duty. The officer was transporting the suspect to a mental health facility pursuant to involuntary commitment papers. When they arrived at the facility, the suspect became physically combative and began kicking and grabbing the officer. His hand restraints injured the officer around his neck and chin to the point where the officer had to use his Taser to subdue the suspect.

Stay Alert: A 26-year-old woman called police last week after being assaulted while she was driving her car. She told officers that she was driving on North Tryon Street with the suspect in the passenger seat when they stopped at a traffic light. While they were waiting at the light, the suspect struck her in the head three times and then got out of the vehicle and ran away. The victim stated that they were not arguing, and she has no idea why the suspect struck her. I actually react the same way when the person I'm riding with is texting while driving.

Three Options: A 50-year-old woman and her 23-year-old son filed a police report last week after they were both threatened by the same suspect. The woman told officers that the man called her and said, "I'm going to have your son shot, murdered and killed." He then called the son he was speaking about and told him, "Your mama won't make it to work tomorrow. Something is going to happen." What's going to happen?!

Man Up: A 16-year-old boy's neighbor called police last week after the boy came to him for help. The man told officers that the boy came knocking on his door asking him to drive him to the hospital because the bite on his leg needed medical attention. The boy claimed that his father refused to take him to a doctor. The case was given to Social Services. Maybe his dad is a follower of that religion that believes only in the power of prayer ... even if your leg was mangled by a rabid dog.

Carrie Underwood: A 41-year-old man called police last week after his car was vandalized by his ex-wife. The man told officers that the suspect threw a vase through the driver's side window of his vehicle because she was still angry at him about their divorce. When your psychiatrist told you to get him some flowers to win him back, I don't think this is what she had in mind.

Thirsty Patron: Employees at the Uptown Westin Hotel called police last week after a man attempted to steal from them. An employee at the bar told officers that a man came behind the bar and began drinking Jose Cuervo tequila and Southern Belle whiskey. He then returned to his room without paying for what he had drank. For some people, the mini bar is just too mini.

Keep Trying: Police and medics responded to a University-area apartment complex last week after a 26-year-old woman continuously attempted to commit suicide. Police showed up at the woman's apartment at 3 a.m. and encountered the victim, who told them that she was depressed and had already tried to jump off of her third floor balcony twice that night.

Senior Prank: Police responded to a local middle school on the last week of school after a student threw a flaming pyrotechnic device through an open school bus window while it was parked at the school. You're supposed to do this before they pick the kids up. Now you still have to go to class.

Threat of the Week: A 21-year-old woman filed a police report last week after being harassed and receiving threatening text messages throughout the first half of 2011. The victim told officers that, beginning in January, she had received 64 threatening texts from the suspect. The text that finally made her decide she had to act stated, "I am going to give your ass and give the streets something to talk about. I am going to beat your baby out of you. When I finish beating your ass to death then I will leave you alone. I'm back, so you better think of a game plan. LMAO. Hope you have fun. I got a letter for you to tell your baby daddy to stop worrying about you." Well, that was the weirdest use of LMAO ever.

Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department.